Me Like Words
Monday, July 17, 2006
 
Sideburns
The part of the beard that grows in front of the ears.


Nothing says 'I'm here to kick some ass' like a nice set of sideburns. I would know, I own a fine pair myself. With hundreds of different styles and variations your sideburns can say as much about you as a mustache or beard. But where did this divine word come from? And what does growing hair down the side of your face have to do with burning? Nothing, actually; sideburns are named after a man.

The Civil War was a great time if you liked destruction, death or freeing slaves. It was a bad time if you wanted to live, were from the south or were General Ambrose Burnside. Burnside had risen to fame by inventing a new kind of rifle that was effective and popular but failed to turn a profit. NDB, he said, and joined the army, eventually rising to the rank of General. That, however, is where his luck ran out. Burnside presided over two of the largest Union Army defeats - Fredericksburg and Petersburg - before being stripped of his command. Bummer.

Next Burnside tried his hand at politics where he had considerable better luck, becoming governor of Rhode Island and, later, a senator. Throughout it all Burnside sported huge muttonchops on his face and, when the style became popular, they were re-christened burnsides. Nobody knows why but at some point in time the word was switched around to sideburns and it has remained the same ever since. So when you see me strolling down the street with my sick chops out for all to see, just remember the failed Civil War general to whom I am paying homage.

The great man himself, accompianed by some sick chops.
 
Comments:
how they fuck you gonna talk about sideburns and not show those white motherfuckers from that 90's flagship white show 90210?? i'm tellin you that all the niggas on the block wanted 2 scoops of jennie garth but the real freak is that bitch andrea zucker. you feel me on that?
 
i definitely feel you on that, andrea was so much older than the rest of the cast, which made her the experienced older woman...plus she didnt weigh her sex life down with stupid condoms (recall her baby hannah)
 
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I (me) like words. And even more than liking words I like to know where they come from and how they ended up in my mouth. It's called 'Etymology,' and I hope you like words as much as me do. If you have a word or phrase you've been pondering send it to me at Streeter@StreeterSeidell.com with 'Me Like Words' as the subject.

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